What kids teach us about work

Specifically:

- When you ask someone to help you find your red sippy-cup (important-and-urgent for you), remember that your need for the red sippy-cup may not be their top priority. The purple chew-toy they were mouthing before you came along may be MUCH more important than your latest red-sippy-cup-need.

- If they respond back in a snippy way, remember that you may not know WHY the purple chew-toy is more important to them than your red sippy-cup...and don't go repeating your request so other people with bigger, more-colorful chew-toys can hear. They heard you the first time, but just were using selective hearing. (Now I know that this skill is learned in the toddler years, when purple chew-toys and red sippy-cups are vital teething tools).

- When they DO come to you, after finishing gnawing on their purple chew-toy, and grunt and ask to learn more about your red-sippy-cup-needs, accept their interest graciously, and use your "happy voice" to explain it. Getting them excited may be tough (remember, their teeth still hurt, and other stuff IS going on for them...and for God's sake, you're asking for a SIPPY CUP after all, which you lose every day!); but charm gets you everywhere in this situation.

- When they mention that their teeth hurt, and in fact their nose was running at the time, too (meaning your red-sippy-cup-needs likely wouldn't get met immediately, with or without their help); don't defend your actions. Instead, listen with empathy and ask if you can get them some ice for their gums.

- Especially don't defend your actions, when you repeated your request in a holier-than-thou voice in front of people with bigger, more-important chew-toys. That's not nice, and just makes them mad. If you haven't seen a toddler when mad lately, come to our house...it's not a pretty sight.

- Most importantly, making them mad will ensure you DON'T get any help from them in fiding your red sippy cup. Maybe if you'd just played nice, they'd have helped you more...but they're back to gnawing on their purple chew-toy, and you're still stuck searching, with one less ally to help you find that cup.


Morals of the story
- Know your toddler's situation - are they teething? Runny nose? (and if you can't figure it out first, don't assume you know everything)
- Don't assume that they're ignoring you on purpose (they really may be busy)
- And above all else, don't embarass your toddler - your hubris will not yield the results you were seeking - even if you were right about the whole thing.