
Rohan is 15 months old. He is a bright, sweet-natured, wavy-light-brown-haired toddler, who loves to dance to music, bang toys loudly, pet the cat, play with his share-care partner Layney, and follow his brother Deven just about anywhere. He is adventurous and giggly, listens well, and will do what you ask (come here, go there, put the ball in the box, etc). And while he makes lots of sounds, he isn't
speaking any words at all yet.
When I started voicing my concern about this ~ a month ago, I got a host of groans and eye-rolling from pretty much everyone I spoke with who didn't have a "MD" or "RN" next to their name.
"Annie down the street didn't talk until she was 4 - everyone talked for her so she didn't need to!"
"He's in a bilingual household - he's just listening more than speaking."
"Don't worry about it, Kate - he'll come around."

With these and many more comments, I covered my inner Mommy Radar for about a week, and tried to focus on other things (like getting home on time as I'd been working a lot lately).
HELICOPTER MAMA
Finally, with no real change in his speech recently, I decided to act. I called our pediatrician's office, and asked them for status and referrals. I don't think by noticing a concern and acting upon it, I'm being difficult or a
helicopter parent, though I admit I was just a teeny bit proud of being titled as such, when Yogesh laid that title on me this afternoon as we were discussing this issue yet again. And yes, Yogesh, I promise to NOT devolve further into a "Black Hawk" parent - but while our kids are still in diapers, I will wear the
Helicopter Parent badge proudly.
STATUS QUO
I didn't listen to the groaners; because I believed that something was and is amiss in Rohan's ability to speak. We can hear him *trying* to form words; and he has communicated his like or dislike with head-nodding no, pointing, and ear-piercing screams for months now. But, no words - not even close. The best he can do so far is a "Ba" sound for "ball" - and variations on that for various things "Bao" for "cat" (Deven used "Dao" so we still use that a lot to refer to Mr. Idea the cat); "Baa?" for music/radio, etc.
My unease, paired with the one formal assessment with a speech therapist that we had last week (see typical milestones/expectations by age,
here)
and too much reading on the Internet and in books on the topic - we - or at least I - have agreed with the Speech Therapist that he's behind in developing the ability to speak; and should receive additional help, now; before his little brain has hardwired something unhelpful that will have to be undone later.
NOW WHAT?
Since language is so core to a human's sense of self, I've taken many steps already to try to assist him:
- Scheduled a hearing test (earliest possible: next Friday midday)
- Had the Speech Therapist look for signs of Autism (I'm pretty sure it's not this; as he exhibits none of the other symptoms, but what do I know? I'm no expert)
- Contacted the local nonprofit manager of tax-dollar-subsidized speech therapists and started the process to get him help,
GGRC (like any good government-funded group, they've taken my info and will call me back in ~ 2 weeks...sigh)
- Called our insurance company and found out (to my dismay) that the only in-network Speech Therapist option in the Bay area is in Oakland and only works on Fridays (ugh!)
- Scheduled a visit with that only in-network Speech Therapist for next Friday (did I say ugh! already?)
- Scheduled a second visit with the assessing Speech Therapist
- Called 4 other places: 2 other speech therapists; 1 audiologist/ENT (Ear-Nose-Throat) specialist, and a pediatric ENT.
- Brought Daadi into the conversation. She has taken it upon herself to help him speak -and even as I sit here, I realize her constant love and attention and speaking may become instrumental to his developing-out of this little issue
- Reviewed what science there is on the Internet on this, and found that Omega 3s can help speech/brain development, so went out and bought some junior-chewable Omega 3 vitamins (which both boys can take...heck, it can't hurt).
I'm hopeful that these steps, and continuing the Speech Therapy, will show results...soon.
NO COMPARISON
I hesitate to compare Rohan to Deven in print, as I know they are very different little people. But it's impossible not to do so in real-life - the scary-downward-spiral of fearful thinking that my younger child will be forever stunted can be (ok, has been) all-consuming. But in fact, part of what convinced Yogesh that I might not be totally over the edge on this point, was to remind him of where Deven was @ the same age and we were vacationing in Hawaii (sorry, Rohan - comparisons to big brother are the curse that the 2nd child must bear).
To be fair, Rohan is ahead of Deven at the same age in other things - he's climbing and sliding and performing many more gross-motor skills more confidently than Deven was at this age...but those gross motor skills don't accomplish the same outcomes as the fine motor skills of tongue-wagging.
So, here we sit in early March, and things haven't progressed much since my first realization that something was wrong. But, I'm glad we now at least have a semblance of a plan.
Photos: 'my boyz' - with the 2 adorable Valentine's Day gifts that Naani
made for them and shipped - the green frog and camo-doggie (thanks Naani, we love them!); and Deven combing Rohan's hair (aaawww).