Aah, that makes sense

I took Rohan to the Audiologist and Pediatric Otolaryngologist (say that 10 times fast!) on Friday, and came out with some good news, and some bad news.

But first, a story that Grandpa Doug recounted to me, when I told him the situation:

A woman went to the doctor & said "Doc, I'm having terrible gas. It doesn't smell bad, but people can hear me passing gas and I'd like to fix it."
The doctor looked at her & said "ok, take these pills and come back next week."
The woman did as he said. When she came back, she said with dismay "Doc, I'm still having terrible gas, only now it smells bad, too."
The doctor replied "well, the good news is, now we've fixed your sense of smell. The bad news is, now let's get to work on that gas."
(Hahahahaha!)

THE GOOD NEWS
We now have (at least) 1 logical, likely-fixable, reason that Rohan hasn't started speaking yet.

THE BAD NEWS
It's likely in large part because Rohan can't hear properly, because his ears are filled with fluid!

Rohan basically failed his first hearing test. He can only hear @ ~50-70 decibel level; where the normal human can hear ~ 20 decibels. The fluid in his ears is likely from ear infections or maybe bottles left in his mouth as he fell asleep - no one knows for sure but whatever the cause, we must get it out.
How?
First, we go back to his pediatrician, Dr. Schwanke, and get him to prescribe antibiotics (takes ~ 3 weeks to go the full course). This might work - then we have him re-tested to see whether there's any damage to the audio nerve.
Then, if antibiotics don't work, the next step is minor ear surgery, where he goes under anesthesia (this is the biggest worry-inducer) to have the gunk sucked out and tiny ear tubes placed in his eardrum.
From a god website I learned
"Ear tubes are tiny cylinders placed through the ear drum (tympanic membrane) to allow air into the middle ear. They also may be called tympanostomy tubes."

It's a fairly common surgery, and I hear has very good outcomes. I'm already mentally ready for this if needed, as his Otolaryngologist (again, say 10 times fast!) suggested that the gunk in his ears has already turned the consistency of glue, and thus may not come out easily, even with proper antibiotics.
I want him to hear properly 'asap' - and even though the tubes mean he has to wear earplugs in pools and the bathtub, that's an inconvenience I'm willing to deal with.
So, though there may be more wrong that we can't yet even diagnose, at least we have 1 logical explanation.

Photos are of my boys @ the park, and then snoozing in the car on the way home, this afternoon.

Kate Sherwood
Mobile (650) 387-6767

Don't say it never snows in San Francisco!

Yes, we are lucky to live in one of the finest areas in the world, weather-wise. But the attached photo proves that it even snows here sometimes! Ok, ok, it was really sleet/hail; but the kids were picking it up and throwing it like snowballs at Deven's school, so that counts, right?

It also proves that we're bad parents - we have a winter coat at home that Deven steadfastly refuses to wear - that we should've required him to put on.
Oh, well.

Kate Sherwood
Mobile (650) 387-6767

Forcing Flowers (is that nice?)

Auntie Heather is an expert Horticulturist with the Chicago Botanic Garden. And while forcing things usually isn't said nicely, I think it's a good thing to "force flowers"...See her do it, here!

Talk to me, son

Rohan is 15 months old. He is a bright, sweet-natured, wavy-light-brown-haired toddler, who loves to dance to music, bang toys loudly, pet the cat, play with his share-care partner Layney, and follow his brother Deven just about anywhere. He is adventurous and giggly, listens well, and will do what you ask (come here, go there, put the ball in the box, etc). And while he makes lots of sounds, he isn't speaking any words at all yet.

When I started voicing my concern about this ~ a month ago, I got a host of groans and eye-rolling from pretty much everyone I spoke with who didn't have a "MD" or "RN" next to their name.

"Annie down the street didn't talk until she was 4 - everyone talked for her so she didn't need to!"
"He's in a bilingual household - he's just listening more than speaking."
"Don't worry about it, Kate - he'll come around."

With these and many more comments, I covered my inner Mommy Radar for about a week, and tried to focus on other things (like getting home on time as I'd been working a lot lately).

HELICOPTER MAMA

Finally, with no real change in his speech recently, I decided to act. I called our pediatrician's office, and asked them for status and referrals. I don't think by noticing a concern and acting upon it, I'm being difficult or a helicopter parent, though I admit I was just a teeny bit proud of being titled as such, when Yogesh laid that title on me this afternoon as we were discussing this issue yet again. And yes, Yogesh, I promise to NOT devolve further into a "Black Hawk" parent - but while our kids are still in diapers, I will wear the Helicopter Parent badge proudly.


STATUS QUO

I didn't listen to the groaners; because I believed that something was and is amiss in Rohan's ability to speak. We can hear him *trying* to form words; and he has communicated his like or dislike with head-nodding no, pointing, and ear-piercing screams for months now. But, no words - not even close. The best he can do so far is a "Ba" sound for "ball" - and variations on that for various things "Bao" for "cat" (Deven used "Dao" so we still use that a lot to refer to Mr. Idea the cat); "Baa?" for music/radio, etc.

My unease, paired with the one formal assessment with a speech therapist that we had last week (see typical milestones/expectations by age, here)
and too much reading on the Internet and in books on the topic - we - or at least I - have agreed with the Speech Therapist that he's behind in developing the ability to speak; and should receive additional help, now; before his little brain has hardwired something unhelpful that will have to be undone later.

NOW WHAT?

Since language is so core to a human's sense of self, I've taken many steps already to try to assist him:

- Scheduled a hearing test (earliest possible: next Friday midday)
- Had the Speech Therapist look for signs of Autism (I'm pretty sure it's not this; as he exhibits none of the other symptoms, but what do I know? I'm no expert)
- Contacted the local nonprofit manager of tax-dollar-subsidized speech therapists and started the process to get him help, GGRC (like any good government-funded group, they've taken my info and will call me back in ~ 2 weeks...sigh)
- Called our insurance company and found out (to my dismay) that the only in-network Speech Therapist option in the Bay area is in Oakland and only works on Fridays (ugh!)
- Scheduled a visit with that only in-network Speech Therapist for next Friday (did I say ugh! already?)
- Scheduled a second visit with the assessing Speech Therapist
- Called 4 other places: 2 other speech therapists; 1 audiologist/ENT (Ear-Nose-Throat) specialist, and a pediatric ENT.
- Brought Daadi into the conversation. She has taken it upon herself to help him speak -and even as I sit here, I realize her constant love and attention and speaking may become instrumental to his developing-out of this little issue
- Reviewed what science there is on the Internet on this, and found that Omega 3s can help speech/brain development, so went out and bought some junior-chewable Omega 3 vitamins (which both boys can take...heck, it can't hurt).

I'm hopeful that these steps, and continuing the Speech Therapy, will show results...soon.

NO COMPARISON

I hesitate to compare Rohan to Deven in print, as I know they are very different little people. But it's impossible not to do so in real-life - the scary-downward-spiral of fearful thinking that my younger child will be forever stunted can be (ok, has been) all-consuming. But in fact, part of what convinced Yogesh that I might not be totally over the edge on this point, was to remind him of where Deven was @ the same age and we were vacationing in Hawaii (sorry, Rohan - comparisons to big brother are the curse that the 2nd child must bear).

To be fair, Rohan is ahead of Deven at the same age in other things - he's climbing and sliding and performing many more gross-motor skills more confidently than Deven was at this age...but those gross motor skills don't accomplish the same outcomes as the fine motor skills of tongue-wagging.

So, here we sit in early March, and things haven't progressed much since my first realization that something was wrong. But, I'm glad we now at least have a semblance of a plan.

Photos: 'my boyz' - with the 2 adorable Valentine's Day gifts that Naani made for them and shipped - the green frog and camo-doggie (thanks Naani, we love them!); and Deven combing Rohan's hair (aaawww).

Star-faced Muffin

Deven had fun at school today - and came home with a star on his cheek!

Who's the child here?

We're at the park, and this is the scene: baby brother snoozing, big brother climbing, and the big boy jumped on the climbing-structure & went higher than Deven, as fast as he could!

So who is the child-Deven or Daddy? ;-)

Kate Sherwood

Cultural observance

Today is the US observance of George Washington's birthday (or, of all the President's birthdays).

So we (Mommy, Daddy, Deven, Rohan) all have the day off.

Today like yesterday, we have come to one of our favorite parks, Parque Ninos Unidos at 23rd & Folsom in the heart of the Mission.

It's a large, triangular-shaped park, because it's in the former right-of-way for a railroad from when the City was first planned-out. It has a small grassy area great for soccer, a lovely little-kids area with hobby horses, seesaw, fort with slide, and a big-kids area with a merry-go-round, *huge* climbing structure & massive sandbox, that Deven expressly said he wanted to visit today.

THE CULTURAL COMMENT

Yesterday when we came, it was full of Latino and a few Muslim families (I think- the women were wearing headscarves and modest long sleeves). Big boys and small; rambunctious & polite - lots of dark-haired kids speaking Spanish and (I think) Urdu with their moms & dads. All were all running around having a good time.

Today, by contrast, it's the Invasion Of The White Hipsters. There are perhaps 1/2 the number of kids / people here today, and - no joke - *every single one is white*.

Oh, ok - after 1 hour, a woman with dark skin & corkscrew-curls has shown up...but even her baby is white.

It's interesting, for a few reasons:
- we're in the Mission
- it's a holiday
- we ourselves are a mixed-culture family.

Shall have to think further about this - right now, Deven needs to go pee - in the big-boy pottie (yay!)

Happy Valentine's Day, Daadi!

We have enjoyed the nice weather, and got Daadi some flowers today.

Kate Sherwood
Mobile (650) 387-6767

Happy Valentine's Day 2010!

Daadi's 2 favorite potas (grandsons) snoozing away for their midday nap, before we go buy her some flowers & warm-fuzzy gifts this afternoon.

It's been snowing like mad back East, but here it's a lovely cool sunny day in San Francisco.

At home, Rohan still isn't speaking yet - he says 'Ba' for ball & 'Da' for 'Dao' (what we still call the cat, because Deven said Dao when he was ~ 1 year). Yes his lack of words worries me despite what everyone says.
Deven is almost potty trained...though wiping is still a challenge (ick).

Xoxo!

Kate Sherwood
Mobile (650) 387-6767

Bye-bye, infancy

I want to write a heartstring-pulling post, but the boys need to go to bed (it's 8:15pm).

So, I'll point out the 3-weeble-toy in the center of this photo - it was given to us by Aunt Tammi & Uncle Brian, when I was pregnant with Deven. Both boys *loved* it in infancy (as I understand Alex & A-Mia did before them); the 3 weebles spin & twirl around in a circle to 'Ring Around The Rosie' and can be knocked off easily by infant fingers, and chewed by teething gums.

Now, they haven't used it in months; and we've had 2 babies born amongst our friends: Debi & Shaughn's little girl & Mayur & Hema's, too.

So, this will be passed on soon, ending a chapter @ the Sherwood-Sharma house. Hopefully the recipients will have fond memories - at least as long as the batteries last.
:)